Fork in the road

Wow.  I don’t even know where to begin. I really thought 2017 was going to be my year.  I was going to STRIVE for success. So far it has not we’re already four months in and I want a divorce from 2017.

I have tried to be optimistic

I have tried to be positive

I tried to STRIVE forward

BUT……

I’ve felt nothing but stagnant. School hasn’t gotten any easier since I started back in January. In fact it has not gotten any better. Last week I was slammed with news not once but twice. My instructor even came down on me pretty hard the week before that I cried the whole 45 minute drive on the way home.

My job has been stressful since the start of the New Year too, I’ve had to put in numerous days of OT when I’m not at school which has added to the stress load.

The gym has taken a backseat I haven’t been since maybe January? Meal planning has been a hit and a miss. I’ve cheated way more than I should have and I have put on 30 pounds. Clothes aren’t fitting again. I am not proud of that.

I think part of the problem is I don’t have any real goals set. I decided not to do Trek up the Tower this year because prior to that when I had planned to train, I had an rather painful injury where I had pulled my quad muscles severely so I took two weeks off in order to recover. I thought about 5K the Hardway again but I don’t know my schedule past May, so I can’t even schedule the Color Run either it’s been frustrating so I have been saying no to any commitments like them.

What’s a girl to do?

To be honest, I am not sure what the answer is. Usually I am so sure of myself but my confidence has taken a backseat as well.

Here’s the BUT again…..

Sunday morning, I cleaned out my cupboards and my fridge. I went grocery shopping Monday after work. I stuck to my list and only bought said items on there which I rarely do. I did add a few things that I had forgotten but I didn’t buy any sweets. I made myself a smoothie for breakfast then I drove out to Johnson Lake and walked around 1 time. I also did some upright push ups on the benches along the way (I need to figure out how many benches they are total so I could do the math on how many reps I do on each one) The wind was pretty strong (love Nebraska) is why I only made it around 1 time plus I can tell I am out of shape! I came home and cooked lunch:

Food.jpg

I got some pork chops but I cut it in half and bought some broccoli and cheese tater tots ( I had a coupon) they tasted really good! I did some meal prepping too this week. I have been back to drinking tons of water.

It’s a start. My birthday is this week. I may have a cheat day and I am going to try to make it to the gym this week as well since the weather looks ify the rest of the week so I may not be able to get out and walk.

I have my final today then I start back up with classes next week!

I’ll try to update when I can.

Mags

 

 

 

 

 

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